I’m sure it’s not an uncommon phenomenon that EVE is widely despised by our fairer partners, probably more so than other generally unpopular husbandly pursuits. Even if you’re slouching on the sofa in your underpants, watching sport/sci-fi/documentaries or out drinking beer with the lads, the resentment EVE seems to generate is altogether of a different kind, at least in my experience.

Part of the problem with EVE is that by it’s very sandbox nature it has no defined start and end time. There aren’t any levels or zones that delineate when you could reasonably stop. Also there is a need/temptation for little ‘maintenance’ visits just to queue up skills, check sales orders or some other administrative task. Because of this, the tendency is to have EVE idling on the PC more often than is strictly necessary. Something that doesn’t go down well if you’re caught tidying up your hangar when you had only popped to the loo.

Having recently married, I looked to my more maritally-experienced friends for advice. Fortunately, one is also a corpmate and so suffers from the same problem. We’ve jokingly referred to having to earn “brownie points” by attending to our husbandly duties in order to earn the right to play EVE. We’ve even developed some chat-window shorthand to determine whether a sudden online appearance is with or without the wife’s knowledge.

So for a laugh I thought I’d formalise the process so we’ll have a better idea of whether we should be playing at any given time.

Let’s assume that a brownie point [BP] is worth 10 minutes of EVE time. I would’ve gone for a greater value, but I have a sneaking suspicion that the exchange rate of Good Husbandly Deeds to BPs isn’t going to be great. What follows is a rough guide to how BPs are won and lost.

  • Cooking dinner (+3 BPs).
  • An evening out together (+12 BPs).
  • Time spent watching a chick-flick/X-Factor together (+1 BP per 30 mins viewing).
  • Buying flowers (+3 BPs).
  • Agreeing to another holiday (+3 per days holiday agreed).
  • Going to bed at the same time (+1 BP).
  • Staying up to play EVE instead (-5 to -50BPs).
  • Being caught in the same room as an EVE client – “it’s just on, I’m not playing it, honest.” (-2 BPs).
  • Being caught playing EVE without official clearance (-5 BPs).
  • Administrative EVE visit whilst entertaining dinner guests (-10 BPs).
  • Playing EVE for longer than stated (-2 BPs per 10 minutes overrun).
  • Reading EVE-related blogs on iPhone whilst out (-2 to -10 BPs dependent on situation).
  • Planning life around EVE/rushing home to play (-10 BPs if intentions are discovered).
  • This blog ever being discovered (-240000 BPs).

Current Estimated BPs: 24 (I cooked dinner yesterday and recently agreed to a 7 day holiday). That’s four whole hours of EVE time. I’ll have to see if I can redeem the brownie points before I squander them.

Ga'len · 05/12/2009 at 14:37


This was great. I'm in a similar boat with my wife. She gives me grief when I spend 2 hours playing.

I keep reminding her that the alternatives would be me out with the guys drinking or doing other "man" things.

It really gets her when I remind her that she was the one who suggested I look at playing EVE three years ago as we both hated the changes to SWG.

Well written mate!

Dante Edmundo · 05/12/2009 at 16:40

excellent brownie point system. This could become a standard.

Kirith Kodachi · 05/12/2009 at 18:28

Its been a standard for years. Trust me. 🙁

Yargok · 05/12/2009 at 22:31

Haha, too true!
"getting caught playing eve when you said you were going to pay some bills while she cooked -50" happened today 😉

Jor · 05/12/2009 at 22:38

I have no need for a point system fortunately. My playing time is 8PM to 11PM (EST) after the kids go to bed, and that is my time. I'm spending the time with the family before that, and my wife and I sit on the couch and do our respective hobbies. I restrict my play time to those hours so as to not incur the wife aggro, and she's more than willing to allow me the occasional skill check, etc. and if scheduled in advance, Agony classes (which are sometimes 8 hours long with the roam). So it strikes a good balance. She's always been supportive of the EvE hobby, and is generally interested when I babble on about blueprints, ships, and the new sov changes. 🙂

Latrodanes · 06/12/2009 at 03:05

Hehe…wait 'til kids arrive!!! All I can say is try and get them ("her" for you) hooked on games or their own hobbies. As newlyweds, uhhh, you are each other's hobby for a while yet. Don't worry, EvE will still be here…she never strays far. 🙂

Alexia Morgan · 06/12/2009 at 07:27

When I met my partner I said, "What's your hobby? How would you feel about me asking you to stop spending time on your hobby, or spending less time on it so that I'd feel happier about you being with me? You wouldn't like that? You'd think that would make me out to be controlling and insecure? Sweet…. so you'd be understanding of my hobbies too? Oh, you think everyone needs a hobby, and that living in each other's pocket is a bad idea? That's fantastic."

And so the ground rules are set. 🙂

Seismic Stan · 06/12/2009 at 07:58

Heh, it's good to know I'm not alone, thanks for the feedback folks.

And I know what you mean Ga'len, with regard to the alternatives – my wife claims it's an addiction, but it's not alcoholism or heroin.

Latrodanes, I've always got my trusty advisor Greenbeard, who originally coined the 'brownie point' concept. He's two sprogs down the line so I'm sure he's got a system for that too. Failing that, I'll be knocking on your door ;).

CrazyKinux · 06/12/2009 at 20:39

Hey there!

Welcome to the EVE blogging community!

I added your blog to my EVE Player Blogroll and will list it amongst the recent additions in an upcoming post.

I'd appreciate if you made a post about it and added the blogroll page link to your blogroll!


Seismic Stan · 07/12/2009 at 09:46

Cheers CK, will do.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

%d bloggers like this: